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While watching pornos is usually an act most people choose to do solo, it has consequences that go well beyond just you. Watching porn can and does affect your partner, as well.

Two very respected pornography researchers, Professor Dolf Zillman and Professor Jennings Bryant both with the University of Alabama, have studied the effects of pornography and media for over 3 decades. They have found that when it comes to viewing pornography, nothing good can come of it. They issued a statement in which they said, “no rigorous research demonstrations of desirable effects can be reported.”

Enjoying Porn is a Personal Choice4But while no good results have been found, several seriously damaging effects have been uncovered. From negatively impacting friendships and family ties to devastating romantic relationships, studies have shown that watching porn affects much more than just the viewer.

In fact, studies have shown that even just the occasional porno can leave a person feeling less attracted to their partner. When someone chooses to indulge in pornography often, however, they are much more likely to be upset with their partner’s looks, willingness to try new and more risque sexual acts, and their overall sexual performance.

What causes all of the negative feelings against yourself and your partner? The fact that porn is a highly fictional, heavily edited version of sex. From scenarios to the act itself, no scene in a porno is something you can live up to. These scenes are meticulously shot and re-shot.

From lighting to make up to tiny tweaks and alterations, costumes, wigs and director calls, every aspect of porn is fake and misleading. No one shot is an organic, true expression. It’s all very intentional.

Then we get to the actors themselves. While it’s true that porn actresses tend to undergo surgery more often than their male counterparts, everyone is airbrushed and photoshopped into perfection.

But porn doesn’t just affect how you perceive your partner’s looks or your partner’s insecurities.

Because porn is so focused on men, it gives them an unrealistic expectation of what their partners should be willing to do. One study found that 9/10 of the most popular pornos depicted women being physically or verbally abused.

In the videos, women faced with these violent and degrading acts were at worst neutral. Many behaved positively to it.

porn addiction3Even in more “mainstream” videos, the sexual acts are almost always degrading toward females. Everything is geared toward men and male pleasure.

Porn viewers’ partners say that they are often asked to perform acts straight from pornos that they aren’t comfortable doing, or that they find unacceptable or demeaning.

When interviewed, college-aged women reported that they felt that they weren’t allowed to ask for what they wanted and that they felt they could never measure up to porn stars.

It has even worse emotional complications. While watching porn may not seem like a big deal, women tend to build relationships on love, honesty, respect, and trust. When she discovers that her partner is watching porn, most of which glorifies the exact opposite (infidelity, aggression, abuse, and disrespect), it makes it that much harder for her to trust her partner.

The effects of watching porn while in a committed relationship are terrible. Pain associated with partners watching porn have incredible consequences.

The Different Stages That Cause Porn To Damage Relationships2Many studies have found that when women find out their partners have been viewing porn while in a committed relationship, they feel angry, devastated, mistrustful, betrayed, and even experience a sense of loss. Many of these women display physical symptoms of depression and anxiety. Even worse, some show outward signs of PTSD and others still become suicidal.

If you’re watching porn, not only do you run the risk of leaving your partner feeling ugly, unwanted and depressed, you also leave them in a state of isolation. Most women won’t reach out to their support systems and almost all of them blame themselves.

So if you want to join the fight, spread the word. Grow love. Form meaningful relationships. Don’t give up a loving, romantic relationship for a momentary bit of gratification.